...Spirit's dark inside

Dreams don't lie II

I have not a clue as to what has gotten into me...

I dream about you twice... on Sunday and yesterday night~ both has something to do with jealousy. Every time I woke up from it, I feel a great sense of loss, anger, jealousy and worry.

It is over.
But I know it is not over in my heart... it is not the feelings that died. It is the time, space and the differences in lifestyles that had divided us.

I don't know why, I wondered why too. I even wondered how can I rid myself of this warm feelings.

These dreams are nightmares, haunting me...torturing me.

I don't have the time, energy nor the privilege to patch up again. I do not wish to create another heart aching, heart breaking situation...

Questions like this had been brought up by people:
"So are there still feelings?"
There's no need to even hesitate or think... the answer would simply be: "If we were physically together or the level of understanding was there... everything would've still been the same."

So why am I here writing this?

This is...
Not to beg for any mercy, comfort or any sort of things that makes me looks like I've regretted.
This passage ain't words of regrets.

These are thoughts of you, the past and the present.
A sense of longing, an attachment of my feelings for you... dependence.

In other words, in your kind of language...

I miss you.

.